The Path to Marital Bliss: Getting Ready For Your Big Day...Quickly

   Cher once said that “the trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing - and then marry him.” Wise words. Regardless, people are getting married. People I know are getting married. Congratulations. We are all thrilled that some form of utopia has been reached on your part. Well done on the happiness. (sniff). I know many of you will have been bustling around various wedding fayres/fairs across the country, soaking up the materialistic inspiration that will ensure your day is the absolute best it can be. Will you go traditional, rustic, whimsical, nautical, contemporary or even beach-bound, cementing your place in the archives of Hello magazine's back pages? Don't listen to what the doubters say, those flower girl baskets do need to be made from biodegradable materials, and no, a white lace and satin bow ring cushion does not look “naff”. However, when the doves are 'rented', confetti ready and bouquets planned, it is the dress that will forever be etched in your mind, and everyone else's. So make sure you fit in it.

   The following workout is not for the faint-hearted, but hey, you're getting hitched, so I needn't worry about commitment issues. If you can throw in some days of gentle cardio to supplement this, great, but avoid doing this more than twice a week, due to the stress it places on your body.

Warm up

• 5 minutes of cardio (starting at 4 and finishing at 7 RPE – Rate of Perceived Exertion).
• Dynamic Stretching: 20 x squats, lunges, half press ups, leg swings, heel flicks and arm rotations.
• Glute Activation: Hold the plank and bridge for 3 sets of 20 seconds, each. THIS PART IS VITAL FOR REAR ATTENTION, DO NOT LET SOME PIPPA 'THE ARSE' MIDDLETON STEAL THE DAY.

The Workout

Stage 1 - we're looking at engaging your CNS (central nervous system) properly, so maintain correct form at all times. Perform 3 circuits. Start with the 'link' exercise (skater hop), as well as performing it in between the other exercise. Do 20 reps/exercise. There is no resting period.

• 'The Skater Hop' – bounce from one leg to the other, as though you were a speed skater. Only one leg should be in contact with the ground at any time. Release your inner Scandinavian.
  
  
                                            
  
  

1. 'Bird – Dog' – hands and knees on the floor. Extend your right leg and left arm, then repeat with left leg and right arm. If in doubt, look it up.
   
   
2. 'The Dead Bug' – start with your arms and legs straight up in the air (like a dead bug). Push your lower back into the ground (thus engaging your transverse abdominus) and lower your left leg and right arm. Do 10 reps before changing arms and legs.
   
   
3. 'Reverse Lunge with Kick' – lunge back before stepping back up and kicking out, high, in front of you and making a funny grunting sound. Everyone in the gym is now looking at you. You should never have grunted. Do 10 reps before swapping legs.
   
   
4. 'Single-leg Romanian Deadlift & Forward Reach' – with a very slight bend at the knee, bend over at the waist, keeping your back straight and reach both arms at in front of you. Stand back up straight and repeat on the other side.
   
   
5. 'Moving Press Ups' – start with your hands close together (elbows at sides) and gradually bounce them out as you tire. Your hands should be much wider than shoulder width by your last repetition. Beginners ought to execute this at an incline, so on a park bench or, alternatively, drop your knees and perform the half press up (thus naturally creating an incline with your body) variety.

Now, go wander (no. not be led) over to a stationary bike, cross-trainer, rowing machine or, if you're outside, a hill or green area...you could even run on the spot, in the cosy confines of your soon to be marital suite.

Stage.2.

HIIT (High Intensity Interval Training)– we want to drag your body, kicking and screaming, into a state of oxygen debt. It is from this state that your metabolism will start firing on all cylinders for, up to, the following 24 hours (American College of Sports Medicine’s 15th-annual Health & Fitness Summit & Exposition). So, whether you are sprinting up a hill, peddling on the bike or running (with high knees) on the spot, do it properly and do NOT pace yourself. 

To give you an idea of what's required, when doing this at a stationary bike, my lungs scream for air, my vision starts to slip away and I'm almost certain that, one time, I saw Jesus being taught to moonwalk. Don't finish this stage and realise you still have something left. 

Do not do this on a treadmill.

• 3 rounds of: 30 seconds 5 RPE (Rate of Perceived Exertion) and 30 seconds 10 RPE (flat out)
• 4 rounds of: 40 seconds 5 RPE and 20 seconds 10 RPE.
• 5 rounds of: 50 seconds 5 RPE and 10 seconds 10 RPE.

Warm Down:

• 5 mins gentle cardio.
• Extensive stretching – holding each one for a minimum of 10 seconds. A stretched muscle looks much better than a tight one.

Now go eat something sweet, within the next 15 minutes. See link for details: http://justbootcamp.blogspot.co.uk/2013/02/why-we-should-have-babies.html